A public service announcement from Microsoft

Flowers and cookiesYesterday, Microsoft had asked me in person, with a bunch of irresistible flowers and cookies, to inform you (because they’re incapable of doing so themselves) on the current state of the Windows Vista SP1 beta. I told them I didn’t know such a thing existed, so I said “o rly?“. Which they responded with “ya rly”. And I concluded with “no wai”.

You might think this is the same message you’ve read on some of my competitor’s websites, not quite. It’s different, but I couldn’t put my hands on exactly what’s different, maybe you, my loyal readers, can help me out here.

Oh hai, itz Microsoft here.

U can has Vista cheezburger pack when we sez its kompleted, k? Cheezburger packs r seriouz part of our cheezburger lifecycle – we has cheezburger packs 4 all of our produks as part of our promiz to cheezburger flavor improvments, n giv u erly flavor tests iz nomal cheezburger practis – u giv gud fidbak so we can has make better cheezburgers.

Cheezburger packs r jus 1 of >1 thingz us do to improve the cheezburger xperins. We can has also givs improvements to cheezburgers thru cheezburger apdatz, itz gud wai 4 us giv u bestest flavors wen we findz thems. Since Vista has lawnched, ya we no we took 4evar lol, we can has continewed workin wif our fwiendz to improve cheezburger covarige and sidez kompatibilati. Dere iz rite now > 2.1 gazzilon sapoorted cutleries and > 2,000 stikered sidez suc as drinkz n saladz 4 eated wif our cheezburgers. We fink u can has gud xperins eated cheezburger vista 2day.

we kool? awsum. kthxbai.

Windows Update - im in ur cheezburger apdating ur flavours. u r saf. trus us. microsoft

Update: Still no words on the unannounced cheezburger xtras. Cheezburgler Barry Goffe has no new flavors to share.

12 insightful thoughts

  1. LOL! hahaha.. this was really different from what i read from other sites… good work long πŸ˜›

  2. Zat wuz sum awsum staff man, naild it.
    ‘spekt from redmawnd dawg.

    keep `t rele

  3. lol very funny – so this is microsoft slang

    any idea how that would sound if apple wrote it? whats their slang?

  4. @Marco

    -“Insanely Great”
    -“BOOM!”
    -“Beautiful!”
    -“Groundbreaking”!
    -“…Blabla vista sucks, blabla…”

  5. Cut the lolcat shit out already. Only YTMND has the right to gratuitously ripoff 4chan.

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